Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Progress Report/Rant

I am a frustrated Fat Girl.

From March 1 until August 6, I lost 40 pounds.  If my mental math serves me correctly, I lost 40 pounds in 5 months, which I think is pretty darned impressive.

From March 1 until September 22, I lost 42 pounds.  Yep, in almost two months I have only managed to shed two stinking, measly pounds.  In my book, those two pounds don't even count as I count my losses only when it's 5 pounds because I wear two pounds of make-up and hair care products daily, so the scale tally is not always accurate.

I visited with my amazing dietitian Judy and my very blunt Doctor recently, and both were singing my praises about how well I am doing.  The doctor said two more blood pressure readings like I've had and I will be off blood pressure medication, which was what kicked this off to start with.  The dietitian says my blood glucose and cholesterol look great and I am healthy.  Healthy??  I am still obese!  

Obese and no longer losing weight!  I am still eating well, getting lots of fresh fruits and veggies, no processed food, whole grains and all that other crap.  I am still working out at least five days a week.  Granted, I am still a lush and still enjoy in the occasional Chicago-style red hot or sweet treat from my kitchen, but I am human and Judy says that is okay. So how have I lost a measly two pounds in this long amount of time?  It does not make sense to me.  However, both Judy and Doc explained me to what was going on here.  It's a Fat Girl's worst nightmare:

The Weight Loss Plateau.

I am here, stuck on this god-forsaken plateau of no progress.  I thought when I was at the 25-pound mark I was at a plateau, but as it turned out I was retaining massive amounts of water due to a sharp increase in my beef jerky consumption.  Once I cut back on the Jack Links and increased my H20 intake, I was back in business.  But this plateau is the real thing, not some psych out brought on by delicious dehydrated beef.  

Apparently my body is having some sort of spaz attack.  Currently I am in the 10-pound window I was in from the ages of 16-19.  This was the most "stable" time for my body weight, ie only time I only gained 10 pounds over 3 years compared to 10 pounds in 6 months.  So my body feels comfortable at this weight.  It is natural for it to be at this weight.  It is fighting going anything lower than this weight.  Fortunately, it is not gaining either.

My body is an idiot!!  Doesn't this dumb body realize it will be able to be outfitted in snappy garments from normal retailers whose name does not include the word "Barn" or any other structure that houses livestock.  Note:  Dress Barn, do you realize how cruel it is to make fat girls who already feel like cows carry bags that say "Barn" on them.  I would take my consumer dollars elsewhere, but options are limited as there seems to be only 3-4 retailers who have figured out that there are Fat Girls in America and that we want to look cute. Anyway, doesn't this dumb body understand I am trying to make it healthier and fitter?  Doesn't it see that if it just cooperates it will not be such a hassle to stay crammed into an airline seat!?!?

Ugh.  I am on the verge of saying, "I Give Up!" and I will stay here in Size 14 land and enjoy upper arms that look like bat wings  and flaunt my beer gut and cherish these meaty thighs.  But I can't.  I put it out there that I am trying to do this.  Granted, I am not trying to be thin, because I've spent my whole life hating skinny bitches, I surely cannot become one now (clearly, I cannot even get out of obese land and into overweight land.)  But I set a goal for myself to lose 70 pounds and I am going to do it.  My Medical Team (ie Judy & Doc) both reassure me that this plateau will pass and I will soon be on that downscale slide once again, I just have to be patient and keep doing what I am doing.  But quite frankly, it sucks, as I am doing all this stuff and not seeing results.  And the self-fulfillment bullshit of, "Oh Cari, you ARE making yourself healthier by keeping it up, it's a gift to yourself," doesn't cut the mustard with me.  I just want to see less fat and possibly a size 12.  

Unfortunately, this plateau has really caused me to neglect my blog.  I am quite embarrassed to get on here and admit I am stuck at this weight.  I don't have anything to write about at the moment, as Stinky Old Man seems to have changed schedules at the gym.

So, I've decided to add a new regular (completely random) feature here at Follies of a Fat Girl called Fat Girl Favs.  It's no secret that I love to eat and I love to cook.  I have been learning many wonderful recipes and have created a lot of tips and tricks on my own and would like to share them.  So when inspiration strikes, I am going share info from my kitchen.  

For now, there is leftover birthday cake in my fridge that requires my immediate attention. After all, I am not gaining weight at this plateau, so I might as well enjoy it.

2 comments:

  1. We're all human, you'll get past it, have faith!

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  2. Have you tried switching up your workouts? Trying a class at the gym you've never done before? Pumping iron in addition to cardio? Sometimes switching up your workout routine can startle your body into losing again.

    Don't be embarrassed about not losing, it happens to all of us. Plus, your blog keeps me inspired, so I do hope you keep writing.

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