Sunday, September 2, 2012

I Count One Sad Girl, Ah Ah Ah

Fewer things remind me of how lucky of a girl  I am than when personal tragedy strikes my world. My friends have an incredible way of rallying around me and helping me pull through the darkness.  They remind me that in a great loss, there is joy to be found from the happiness that was once in my world. My wonderful friends remind me of the happy times to help my tears and sobs turn to smiles and laughter.

I recently went through a loss that rocked my world worse than when Davy Jones passed away. Jerry Nelson, a puppeteer for Sesame Street, passed away. You may question why I am so torn up over a puppeteer from a children's show.  The answer is that Nelson brought life and voice to the first man I ever loved:

Count von Count

Yes, Count von Count was my first real crush in life.  I hesitate to even call him a crush, because crushes fade over time whereas I harbor a love much deeper for The Count. To this day, I get silly thinking about him. There is something about this arithmomaniac that just makes me feel happy and warm inside. Even watching him as an adult, I always felt as if the flashes of thunder and lightning after he successfully counted were for me because he knew that I love storms.   I carry an unhealthy jealously towards both Countess von Backwards and Countess Dahling von Dahling for getting to be the romantic love interests of The Count.

Like so many heartbroken women before me, I would channel my pain over seeing his preference for another woman into something creative, such as making The Count the first time I ever worked with gumpaste:
Made of pure sugar cause he's so sweet.

While I know that technically The Count is not gone, Nelson was the man who gave life to my sweet Count. I am sure the new puppeteer for Count will do a lovely job but it just won't be the same. When I read of Nelson's passing, I felt crushed inside knowing that the Count that I know and love is gone as well. Will The Count2.0 have the same level of manic crazy when he gets interrupted? How will his sorrow for running out of things to count translate now? It was just all too much to think about and I needed to grieve, hence why I was reminded that my friends are amazing. I heard from 18 people over Mr. Nelson's passing.  Messages, texts, a  facebook post and a few phone calls all came in from concerned friends expressing their sympathies.  Big Brother made it a point to ask how I was coping when we met up for a beer.

Think about it, almost 20 people in my life reached out to me when the puppeteer of The Count died, which allows us to draw two conclusions:
1. My friends are amazing,
2. My friends also suspect that I am an unstable whack job

Regardless of whether my sanity should be questioned because I carry a flame for a piece of animated felt, the pain I have felt in knowing that The Count I love will never be back is very real.  I have always considered Count von Count my personal, "One That Got Away," and Mr. Nelson's death just solidifies that fact for me.

It's a tough pill to swallow, to know that this dream will never be a reality:
What was once a high hope is now a mere shattered dream

Thank you to everyone who has helped me through this challenging period in my life.  And to Jerry Nelson, I hope you are at peace.  Thanks for bringing The Count to life and allowing me feel a love that I will carry in my heart for a lifetime.

Rest in Peace, Jerry.

1 comment:

  1. one sad girl plus 20 amazing friends = wonderful life. Don't stop counting. ah ah ah
    Love and hugs,
    ant jenny